Change of Plans

When you hear someone say, "Change of plans...", do you get excited or nervous? A growing sense of curiosity or dread? How do you view change?

I'm a planner. I like agendas and meal plans and schedules and I'm not ashamed of that. I wouldn't consider myself a control freak, but I like to know what to expect and I like it when things go my way. Lately, in my spare time, I've found myself mentally sketching out my weekend plans or thinking about how I can alter a situation to make it go in my favor (I realize that sounds a little more like "plotting"...). Anyway, oftentimes, I'll expect my day's events to happen a certain way. This week, though, nothing really seemed to go as planned. Here are some examples:

1. Expectation: It was my friend's birthday and I was going to bring him his present and chat for a little while. Nothing big.

Reality: His girlfriend had planned a surprise birthday party for him and created a Facebook page for it, but I hadn't checked Facebook in a while so I didn't know. I found out about it after it started, when another friend called me to ask where I was.

Reaction: This change of plans threw me a little because I felt left out, even though I had been invited. Additionally, it was difficult for me to make myself go to the party because it wasn't on my terms. Does anyone else have a hard time adjusting when plans change? I do. BUT, I decided to go anyway because, well, you should go to your friends' birthday parties. It's just what you do.

I was glad that I went and got to see my friend, and even though it wasn't a super-special moment for me, I hope it meant something to him that I came. 

2. Expectation: I got a ticket for stopping too far over the line at a stop sign a couple weeks ago. I went to the court to pay it, expecting it to cost $60, maximum.

Reality: My ticket is going to cost me $120, plus $60 if I want to do traffic school (so I can avoid getting my license suspended). That blows.

Reaction: I was not happy about that. However, I remembered that I had a check for exactly that much money that I hadn't cashed yet and had nearly forgotten about. Even though I would've liked to spend that money on something nicer than a ticket, I also felt like it was a little gift from God. I don't like to throw the term "tender mercy" around too often, but the fact that the ticket and the check were the exact same amount felt like God was looking out for me.

I have a bunch of other examples of things not going the way I wanted them to, but I'll spare you the gory details. I guess the point of this post is just to say that life doesn't really go the way we plan. It's in God's hands and we are basically just strapped into His roller coaster. So, be flexible. We can't control a lot of what happens to us in this life, but we can control how we react to the high speeds and unexpected turns and blood-rushing-to-the-head loops. We can choose to recognize God's hand, even when it's difficult, and that's possible because God is everywhere.

Hi, I'm INFJ. What are you?

On Thursday, I took the Meyers-Briggs "16 Personalities" quiz and it COMPLETELY ROCKED MY WORLD. I don't know if I'm just really behind the times, but it was probably the most accurate personality test I've ever taken (and I reallllllly like personality tests). How have I never known about it before? If you haven't taken it, I highly recommend it because it's just so eerily spot on.

So this personality test asks you a bunch of questions about yourself and you rate how much you agree or disagree with them. Then, the results tell you about 4 categories: if you are Introverted or Extroverted, use iNtuition or Sensing, favor Thinking or Feeling, and if you're a Judger or Perceiver. Then these words make up your personality's acronym. So, I'm INFJ, meaning I'm Introverted, iNtuitive, favor Feelings, and a Judger. They give an explanation for what each word means and to what degree you do those things. Then they have pages and pages of explanations about your personality type in relationships, friendships, as a parent, your role in the workforce, in the world, etc. It's so interesting! So, if you're looking for a way to get to know yourself better, I suggest you take this test. https://www.16personalities.com

I learned that my personality type is pretty rare. Only about 1% of the world has it so, yeah, I'll be signing autographs after this (lol). But seriously, when I was growing up, I always felt kind of different from most of the kids my age. I felt like I was supposed to be an extrovert, but I just couldn't do it. I felt like maybe something was wrong with me because I often felt drained of energy after a social gathering and just wanted to go home the whole time. As I've gotten older, I've realized that more people feel the same as I do about being introverted and I've discovered that it's not a flaw. I've also discovered and developed new parts of my personality and this test's explanation of me was just so helpful.

There are other people like you, but you are still pretty unique. You're not alone, but you're also a very special individual. Everyone is. Isn't that cool?

Life Thoughts

Four long, confusing, emotional semesters at BYU and several mental break-downs later, I finally decided on a major and made it MyMAP official. Never before had I changed my major on paper because it always felt too restricting, too set in stone. Even though the rational part of my brain knew I could make a new change whenever I felt like it, the irrational part feared that I'd be signing my life away to some unknown entity that would tie me down and steal my identity and force me to work at a job I would forever loathe. I know. It's irrational. But seriously, I could never bring myself to change my dang major -- until now.

Over the summer I realized that it was finally time to buckle down and just pick major. I decided on Landscape Management, veering far from my previous health care path. I wasn't completely sure about it but I enrolled in the classes anyway. This week, I fell in love with it. I look forward to every class and actually enjoy the material I'm learning. I can see myself actually doing this work in the future and enjoying it! That's a complete shift from my mentality about nursing or dietetics or anything of the like. It's an amazing feeling to actually look forward to the future; something I've never really experienced.

I don't know what that means for everyone else. Maybe it's about not settling. I used to hate it when people told me not to settle because how was I supposed to know if I was settling? Now I realize that the only way to fight the dangers of settling is to experience life. I also used to hate when people told me that because I didn't know where to start. So recently I've been trying to say "yes" more frequently. The more I say yes, the more experiences I get and basically my horizons have broadened a lot. I am not in the place I thought I'd be a year ago, and for that I am so grateful. One simple yes decision I made back in May has led me to new friends, new experiences, a new career path, and a new outlook on life. I don't know if it was sheer luck or Divine intervention, but I know that life is supposed to be beautiful and if we are open to it, we allow it to unfold for us.

Caution: Labels

Hi internet, nice to meet you! I'm new here *we shake hands*. The name's Lindsay, but my friends call me Londsay. If I like you, I'll even let you call me Lon, hence the name of this blog. Also, did you notice that "Londsay" has the word "say" in it? And this blog is about what "Lon" has to "say"? Yeah, I know. So clever and so awkward! #wordplay 

Since this is my first blog post and it's a real class assignment, I feel very self conscious about my grammar. It's for a grade and the whole class gets to read it and they're supposed to judge me? Yikes! How am I doing Dr. M?

Speaking of judging, first impressions have been on my mind a lot recently. All my life, I've been told  that I shouldn't judge people, but that's kind of difficult. Judgment is part of human nature, right? At times, it's even necessary for survival, right? If I'm walking down a street at 2 AM and a possibly shady character is heading toward me, I'll probably cross the street so I don't get shivved. That person might be the nicest guy in the world, but my instincts tell me to scram. Did I judge? Yeah, but it was for my own peace of mind. So here's a little conclusion for you: There's a difference between being judgmental and using your judgment (I'm sure all of you have thought this before, but sometimes I come to these small epiphanies where I gain a deeper understanding of a cliche I've always heard and I guess this was one of those times).

So. Using your judgment to keep you safe/healthy/happy = good! Being judgmental = bad. Glad we covered that.

I've noticed that there's also this judging-limbo-thing that isn't necessarily good or bad. I meet someone and make an assumption about him or her, be it positive, negative, or neutral, and it's almost always incorrect. I find that usually when I think we'll be great friends, we aren't, and when I think we won't be friends at all, we get really close. That was the case with the last two sets of my roommates. As I look back on most of the relationships and encounters I've had with people in my late teens and early twenties, this seems to be the case. I misjudge. Talking to others about this topic, I've come to another conclusion that usually, everyone's first impressions of people are usually incorrect to some degree.

People are so complex. I find myself (and others) labeling everyone, but that's not a wise thing to do. We are a fluid species, constantly changing our emotions, abilities, and personalities. Additionally, being LDS, I believe that human beings are the literal children of God and they have the potential to become like Him. That being said, how can a man be labeled by a single feature, when that feature is only a small portion of his entire existence? I guess what I'm trying to say is this: giving someone a label is like putting them in a box and refusing to let them out. Labels hinder growth and growth is the purpose of being alive. From now on, when I meet someone new, I'm going to try to keep an open mind and observe them, but not place a label on them. For the people who I already know, I'm going to rip off the labels I've placed on them. I think that breaking that binding will allow them to flourish a little bit more and everyone deserves room to grow.